STATE OF THE STATE – PAKISTAN
Of late Pakistan has been getting bombarded from all directions for various reasons like the powers that be swindling US Aid and stashing it in tax havens, cultivating ISI, cultivating opium, cultivating & harboring terrorists, harboring Osama BL, interfering in Afghanistan, exporting narcotics, routing illegal arms/ explosives, being an ally of China, holding on to PoK, being itself and making Hina the Foreign Minister.
The US of A has threatened to cut off all aid to Pakistan, while China has said it will support its ally in its hour of need. With China holding the aces with respect to US of A, Pakistan is posturing and daring Obama to do it - not unlike Nike! A few days ago Hina was in US of A, ostensibly for rustling up support for Pakistan, but, when the Indian Government landed there in big numbers, she was recalled by the Pakistan Government. On her return to Islamabad, a meeting was called by Gilani and was attended by the ISI as well as the Tribal leader from NWFP. The following is purported to be the proceedings of the meeting.
Gilani: Well Hina dear, how was your trip to that nation of cowards?
NWFP: Don’t use such endearments, it is blasphemy!
Hina: Very successful, I visited their decadent city of New York.
Gilani: And what did you do there?
Hina: I interacted with very senior persons in the sales section of Saks Fifth Avenue, Ricky’s, Zara, Tiffany and Bloomingdale’s and also visited SoHo!
NWFP: Blasphemy! Cut her hair…
Gilani: But, I sent you to Washington to deal with Hillary and Obama…
Hina: They were too busy and I did not get an appointment so had a free day and that is why I decided to visit NY.
NWFP: Cut her tittis, chop off her hair…
Gilani: Will you just shut up for a while, let me deal with this.
ISI: I think it is time to put her to test…
Army: I don’t mind testing her…
Gilani: You one track mind guys just shut your mouths and listen. Where did you get the money for all that shopping?
Hina: (trembling) I got the money from ISI to give to our Ambassador, but I got tempted by all the big brands and went shopping…
ISI: Allah be kind to her, because I will not be…
NWFP: Hang her…in public and shave off her hair….
Gilani: At this rate we will never know why USA threatened to stop all aid to us.
ISI: Enough is enough, I am calling Hu and asking for aid immediately, I don’t have money to pay salaries and slush money…
NWFP: What will happen to my arms market and opium farming…?
Hina: I am sorry; I don’t think all this has to do with my going shopping in NY!
Gilani: Then what in hell happened to Hillary and Obama? Why was the threat issued?
Hina: They have got the list of persons holding money in tax havens through Wiki leaks…
Gilani: Shit, we are all sunk!
Tongue in Cheek by Kali
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