NEW STRATEGY FOR DEBT CONTROL
Obamama was cornered on debt, deficit and donkeys. He decided to think things over and went to sit in a corner of the andah (oval) room. He fell deep asleep while thinking and was now counting elephants somewhere in Kenya. Hillary Clingon, who was quite familiar with the corridors and closets in this Gora Ghar, walked into the andah room and tapped Obamama on his shoulder. Obamama woke with a start and yelled for Michelle to bring coffee. Clingon asked him to hold his donkeys and calm down. She told him there were too many crises to handle and that some quick action was called for. Obamama decided to call for an emergency crisis meeting and told Clingon to call for the bosses of CIA, NIA, Pentagon and also the janitor. Clingon jumped with indignation and asked what the janitor will do in such a meeting. Obamama told her to pipe down and said that a janitor was required to clean up the mess they always create in meetings such as this. Anyway, the meeting was called to order and this is what transpired.
Obamama: Welcome guys, anyone for coffee, there is none to offer anyway.
CIA: I could have got it with me from Langley.
NIA: Are we that badly off?
Clingon: Where were you all these days?
NIA: Sleeping it off in Langley.
Pentagon: Aw, shut up you both. I will tell my Lieutenant to get the coffee from the Pentagon Canteen.
Clingon: OK, do that.
Janitor: Why not call up Starbucks for delivery?
Obamama: See, that is why we need a janitor in these meetings.
Clingon: Well let us get on. India is under control and all funds for Anna have been put in place. The government is in turmoil and they are burning midnight oil.
Obamama: Okey Dokey! Tell CINCPAC to send in a Carrier Group from the 7th Fleet to the Bay of Bunglers.
Pentagon: Bengal! Why?
Obamama: Oh, say it is for R & R!
Pentagon: Wilco. What do we do in Libya, Sudan, Egypt, Syria, Bahrain, Yemen, Somalia and Pakistan?
Obamama: Slow down, you give me a headache. CIA, that’s your backyard!
CIA: As usual we are working in tandem with NIA and Pentagon. We have succeeded in Sudan and will definitely get the situation in control in all the rest. Zardari and Kayani are getting to be a pain in the arse. Kaddafi will be eliminated and we have already identified a puppet to replace him. When will the coffee be here?
Janitor: Ask Starbucks!
Michelle: (peeping in) Starbucks called to say that we have run up a bill of $3.765 million!
Obamama: Who’s been drinking all that coffee?
Michelle: Ask your goddamned janitor.
Janitor: Everyone who voted for you! Remember, you said “Yes We Can” and they all bought a can of coffee from Starbucks and charged it to you.
Obamama: When did Starbucks start selling coffee in cans?
Janitor: Since the recession started in 1929!
Clingon: Shit! Can we discuss the debt of $14 trillion?
Obamama: Who ran up that much of debt and who were the stupid guys to give us so much credit limit?
CIA: Well, our ops don’t come cheap and combined with NIA and Pentagon since 1945, we together ran up that debt, of course, with the President’s seal of approval.
Clingon: And the stupid guys, as you say, were the Chinese!
Obamama: Now I really have a headache, where the hell is that coffee?
Janitor: Starbucks collapsed as of an hour ago. I believe the total debt run up by your government and agencies is $2 billions!!!
NIA: (waking up) Why not have an apple?
All in chorus: Fantastic idea, call in Steve and put in a request for a job for all of us!!!
As you can see nobody is bothered about the debt or the deficit or Starbucks.
Tongue in Cheek by Kali
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